How to Unf*ck Your Life

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when you understand what stage you’re in and the exact “conditions” you need to make progress, what seems impossible now becomes inevitable. Your mind literally reconstructs how it processes reality. (via) ^rwhi879591655

Your life feels terrible because your mind is filled with beliefs that interpret it as terrible. But here’s the truth that psychology points to: You’re in the perfect position to change your life. (via) ^rwhi879896844

Meaning, when you understand what stage you’re in and the exact “conditions” you need to make progress, what seems impossible now becomes inevitable. Your mind literally reconstructs how it processes reality. (via) ^rwhi879896874

that human value systems or worldviews (which influence how we interpret the world and make decisions… in other words, our operating system for reality) evolves through stages in an upward spiral. These stages are the structure of how we think. Each of us as individuals move up the spiral as we age and develop ourselves. But this doesn’t only apply to the individual, it applies to societies as a whole, as you’ll be able to tell. (via) ^rwhi879897308

aperspectival madness occurs when individuals or societies recognize the validity of multiple perspectives (which is good), but then fall into a relativistic trap where they cannot or will not integrate these perspectives or make value judgments between them (which is problematic). (via) ^rwhi879901639

the content of a situation is highly dependent on the context (via) ^rwhi879905002

The self. The strange loop of us thinking about our own consciousness in relation to others. (via) ^rwhi879905290

Your values—beliefs, standards, points of reference, or other elements of identity—shape what is important to you and what is worth noticing. (via) ^rwhi879905324

The stage you are in determines much of what you notice in reality and the opportunities available to you. And the higher stages you reach, the more you can tap into the stages beneath, meaning you have both the ability and wisdom to spot opportunities for varied versions of success and achieve them with grace as you move up the spiral. The question then is, how do I move up the stages beyond the one that makes me feel trapped? (via) ^rwhi879905479

These are the 4 “phases” to expect as you move from one stage to another: • Alpha – Life is good and normal. There is order. • Beta – Doubts arise as you enter a new phase. Doing the same thing only makes it worse. • Gamma – You feel lost. Things are chaotic and turbulent. This is where you can get trapped and feel like there’s nowhere to go. • Delta – Things are vibrant. You make quick progress and reach a new baseline. This is where you learn the most and feel the growth. (via) ^rwhi879906058

Ken Wilber’s Wake up, Clean up, Grow up framework for human development. Wake up meaning becoming aware of your true nature beyond the ego—accessing states of consciousness beyond ordinary waking awareness. Clean up meaning psychological healing through shadow work—addressing unconscious or repressed aspects of yourself that are causing unnecessary harm. Grow up meaning cognitive, moral, and perspectival development—expanding your cognitive complexity and worldview while building the capacity to take on multiple perspectives. (via) ^rwhi879906625

Change must be possible if you want to reach the next stage. You need either the skill acquisition, resources, or environment that allows you to see the potential for change. This corresponds to the concept of “horizontal development” in Susanne Greuter’s ego development theory. In order to move up vertically (to new stages) one must acquire a sufficient amount of knowledge, skill, and experience within their current stage. You can’t jump up stages without ample development in the stage you are in. (via) ^rwhi879907179

I personally like to think of self-development as an endless series of problems that, once solved, increase in meaning and complexity, making life more interesting as you solve them. Since the majority of you are in stages blue through green, and since we are focused on our personal lives, these will almost always involve the big 3: • Work • Health • Relationships (via) ^rwhi879907193

Once you are stretched between two opposite poles (your old way of life and the new approach you want to take), you will encounter obstacles on the path. If you are an aspiring writer, you may fall into the trap of perfectionism. You start projects and then quit because they are never good enough. With this specific obstacle, you would need to reframe your relationship with perfectionism. You would need to realize that the only way to get better is to start with something you find embarrassing, knowing that others actually don’t care that much, and improve as you continue practicing the craft. (via) ^rwhi879907574

The purpose of education, at this point, is awareness. (via) ^rwhi879907595

I can give you examples and processes, but if you don’t have the ability to understand where you are and who you are, those won’t serve you much. The path will be confusing. It’s not supposed to make sense just yet. When you’re doing something new, you aren’t supposed to be anything other than lost because you’re flailing in the middle of the ocean until you learn how to swim (or build a boat). (via) ^rwhi879907610