Grappling With Purpose and Responsibility on Acid

Highlights

I took two tabs of Ascend last night. I watched a couple of movies, Blade Runner 2049, and started watching The Revenant. Fell into a lot of ideas as I was watching the movie on acid about what the fuck I am doing with my life. You know, the typical acid-induced thoughts. The part of me that wants freedom in the name of not needing to hold down a 9-5 job so he can travel and the other one that knows that at least for now he got to do this 9 to 5 thing even though it not his purpose to potentially create a life with this woman that he is really really loving.
So it's like grappling between responsibility and purpose. What happens when they're not the same thing and how can I realign so they can become one and all and how can I be with it until it is realigned in the discomfort, is that a possibility?
And this morning I just tried messaging a bunch of people, I have a lot of ideas. So I'm going to write a little bit around the need of community for people who are in a relationship. How important that is. ^rwhi816032238