In 2018, lost and looking for something more, I was on a self-imposed sabbatical in Kaua’i. My first night there, I met a guy named Brad, who unbeknowenst to me at the time, would go on to shape my life. One of the biggest things he taught me was the power of letting go of control.
You see, I can’t swim. I’ve documented my NDE experience, as well as my past life drownings, in my book. When you’re in Kaua’i though, you can’t help but be surrounded by waters everywhere. And Brad loved to swim.
Despite my insistence and attempts to tell him that I can’t swim, he tried to teach me. During one of these lessons, we “swam” from one shore to another, a distance of about 200 meters. I barely made it, holding onto one of his legs almost the whole way. This is when he shared his lesson.
“You’re struggling because you’re trying to fight the current. Do you think you’ll ever be able to conquer her? What happens if you just let go?”
As soon as he said it, I realized what I’d been my whole life. This holding on.
This fight was exhausting. And it wasn’t the current that was taking me down. It was my own control.
A current is a potent metaphor for big emotions. Fighting the current is akin to holding everything in. It’s exhausting. Allowing for the emotions waiting to be felt is akin to surrendering to the current and allowing ourselves to fall. It’s in this fall and surrender where we can actually move through.
There is a Hopi prophecy that talks about a fast flowing river. This river is great and fast. And it will make many very afraid. They’ll try to hold onto the shore, to survive. What they don’t realize is that the river knows the destination, and the ones who are willing to let go are the ones who are carried by the river.
This river and this current can signify many things. Emotions. Attachments. Connections. Ultimately, letting go into this river and this current is trust. It’s trusting in the unknown, and in the Knowing that we are held.
You are held.